I can't
In TaeKwonDo class, Haydar (my instructor and friend) and I often have discussions that go something like this:
Haydar: I want you to learn this next form today.
Me: I can't.
Haydar: What? No. Today, you will learn this form.
Me: (slightly whinier) But, I can't.
Haydar: Why? Just do it.
Me: (sounding more and more like a petulant 3-year old) I don't want to and you can't make me.
Haydar: Learn the form.
Me: (roll eyes, stomp to the other end of the room and start learning the form, all the while insisting that I can't)
You can substitute just about anything in the place of "learn the form", including "do this test", "kick higher", "correct your stance", or "put your feet like this". And any time that I protest that "I can't", I end up doing it anyway. Haydar won't let me believe that I can't, and won't listen to me protest, which is probably a good thing, or I would still be a white belt.
In my TaeKwonDo classes, I have learned to fail on the way to succeeding. To practice the same move over and over again until my muscles remember better than my mind, and I move on instinct. I am faaaaaaaaar from perfect, but I have started to silence the voice that keeps saying "I can't" and changing it for "I'll try".
After more than 15 years of smoking (off and on, but more on than off), I've decided to also stop saying that I can't quit. Over the past two weeks, yes, I have cheated a bit, but I'm not letting these small failures stop me from succeeding at this too. I proved to myself last weekend that I can even drink and not smoke. Getting emotional or feeling a bit of stress did not send me straight to the store to buy a pack and just start up again. If I'm brave enough to announce it here, I can't let myself down. I just can't.
Oh, right, the point of this post was really to announce that I got my RED BELT. Next step: Black. Think I can do it? Go to this page on Cassie's blog to see what the 8 forms look like. Yes, I can actually do all the movements, just not as well as the guy in the video.
Haydar: I want you to learn this next form today.
Me: I can't.
Haydar: What? No. Today, you will learn this form.
Me: (slightly whinier) But, I can't.
Haydar: Why? Just do it.
Me: (sounding more and more like a petulant 3-year old) I don't want to and you can't make me.
Haydar: Learn the form.
Me: (roll eyes, stomp to the other end of the room and start learning the form, all the while insisting that I can't)
You can substitute just about anything in the place of "learn the form", including "do this test", "kick higher", "correct your stance", or "put your feet like this". And any time that I protest that "I can't", I end up doing it anyway. Haydar won't let me believe that I can't, and won't listen to me protest, which is probably a good thing, or I would still be a white belt.
In my TaeKwonDo classes, I have learned to fail on the way to succeeding. To practice the same move over and over again until my muscles remember better than my mind, and I move on instinct. I am faaaaaaaaar from perfect, but I have started to silence the voice that keeps saying "I can't" and changing it for "I'll try".
After more than 15 years of smoking (off and on, but more on than off), I've decided to also stop saying that I can't quit. Over the past two weeks, yes, I have cheated a bit, but I'm not letting these small failures stop me from succeeding at this too. I proved to myself last weekend that I can even drink and not smoke. Getting emotional or feeling a bit of stress did not send me straight to the store to buy a pack and just start up again. If I'm brave enough to announce it here, I can't let myself down. I just can't.
Oh, right, the point of this post was really to announce that I got my RED BELT. Next step: Black. Think I can do it? Go to this page on Cassie's blog to see what the 8 forms look like. Yes, I can actually do all the movements, just not as well as the guy in the video.
posted by Ms Parker at
10:55 PM
8 Comments:
What? You've been smoking for about 15 years? Meh, you were my idol, a model for me... I thought you were a little angle with blonde hair! Oh, now, I'm all disillusioned...
Allright, I'm just joking ;) Love you still hehe ;)
1. Congrats for your red belt!
2. Brake the necessary amount of legs to be lucky enough to get your black belt!!
3. But don't dismember every Korean because you can't quit smoking ;) You'd better knock on wood instead...
See ya xxx
By
Jiji, at 5:01 AM
I love the way you get straight to the point in your blogs.
:)
Congrats on the Red & keep up the no smoking thing... I know you can!
By
Goulash, at 8:22 AM
Way to go on the not being a smoker any more. I smoked for 12 years and I quit 3 years ago. You can do it! And you can get the belts too!
By
Anonymous, at 10:11 AM
Yeah for the Red Belt! you will have to demonstrate in Mtl...because you are going to be here right!
By
Anonymous, at 8:00 AM
hey man, I watched that video. Dude's moving so fast that even his clothes sound fierce. That fact that you can a) remember all that and b) execute them (albeit "imperfectly" as you say) makes my head asplode.
Cudos, that's feckin arsome!
By
Vanessa, at 9:26 AM
You go girl!!!
I love hearing stuff like this!!!
By
Brent, at 2:57 PM
i learned that when you quit smoking there are times that you have an absolutely insatiable desire to have just one cigarette. If you do have a smoke, the feeling goes away. if you wait 15 minutes and don't have a smoke, the feeling goes away anyway. You just have to believe you can make it that far - and we all know you can
see you in april
alan
By
Anonymous, at 9:01 PM
What an amazing self-realization. I'm proud of you.
By
Anonymous, at 9:17 PM
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