Brave and Crazy

I rode Red Devil to work today.

Then rode her home again in the afternoon.

Then back to school again.

Then back home.

Happily, I picked the time when every single 18-wheeler in Korea goes through Suncheon on the same road as I do. That was a bit scary. However, given the fact that I fear even crossing the street here, I was pleasantly surprised that it just didn't seem that dangerous at all. I mean, you have to be alert and aware of everything around you, but it was no different from riding my bike around La Pocatiere with all the pick-up trucks passing me with 2 inches to spare. There are so many scooters and motorbikes on the road that you really seem to have your own space as a true vehicle.

Surreal moment: A man leaned out the passenger side window of the car he was in and kept waving and saying "Hi!", and wouldn't stop until I waved back. Thankfully, he didn't continue with the rest of the ritual ("How are you, I'm fine thank you. Where are you from? How old are you?...")

Mom arrives in 2 more sleeps! (which is good, because I'm down to my last squeeze of toothpaste. Also feel that body is lacking in essential vitamin pierogy - ya, she's bringing some from Canada. If Koreans can travel with kimchi, my Ukrainian mommy can travel with pierogies!)

And, I'm a green belt. (No, not like farmland... like TaeKwonDo)

And Jakob is proving that there is nothing more annoying than a kitten. His "crazy kitten hour" goes from 5 am to 7 am, at which point the next hour is devoted to attacking my ankles while I try to get ready for work. Any time the front door opens, he is out like a shot, running down the hall with tail puffed and back arched.

One of my students asked me my blood type today. And then nodded quite sagely when I told her "A+". I know this is a cultural thing, just not sure why.

Gwangju Weekend

Just got back from Gwangju, where I spent an awesome weekend with Karen, Morgan and Arsalan. Highlights included shopping for jewelry with Morgan, shopping for clothes with Arsalan (he and I make a wonderful shopaholic duo), eating lots of delicious food with Nicola at the "Foreigner Festival", being recognized by the shop girl at Aveda, chatting endlessly on a street corner with a very flustered Korean man (No English! said he, as I babbled on) while wandering the streets at 4 am with a few American GIs and Max, my friend from Naju who finally dragged me away from the poor man. All in all, a great weekend - but so tiring!

I'm a bit bummed though, because my new camera (that I bought from Arsalan) seems to have swallowed my photos - or my computer did - and they have vanished into thin air. I'm mad: I had a great pic of Stu and Max looking hungover in a Japanese restaurant, and a super wicked awesome pic of Morgan and Karen. Also a picture of me enjoying some Indian food.

My mom arrives on Friday morning, and I am really excited. So are a few of my friends who will certainly share in the bounty that will arrive from Canada. Plans for her visit include a trip up to Seoul to the DMZ (Demilitarized Zone), a visit to Gwangju, my b-day in Mokpo and, most certainly, a few scooter rides and TaeKwonDo classes.

Took my scooter out for a boot on Friday afternoon.... and even had to gas her up. Yes, for the first time in my life, I have bought gas for a vehicle that I own. In an "Only in Korea" moment, the girl who filled my tank was dressed in a sort of cheerleader get-up, which is completely normal here, you know.


This week, I will be passing my first TaeKwonDo test. Eeek. Wish me luck. By the way, just stole this pic off Cassandra's site. I'm in the back, 2nd from left, watching Joey and Haydar go at it. Hopefully, I will never ever ever ever ever have to spar with Haydar. Joey is a brave brave boy. (No, I do not spar for my test)

My Little Red Devil

OH MY GOD!

I own a scooter!

(that I can't really ride yet)

Just bought it from Haydar, my Taekwondo teacher for about $500 Cdn. I figure that if he can teach me to kill someone with my bare hands, he can also teach me how to keep my balance on this infernal machine. Just rode it for about 20 minutes, and since both of us survived, I can only assume that it's all good.

And, if Italian fashinistas can ride them in Gucci heels, I should have no problem figuring it out, right?

*pic is not of my bike, but of a random red Daelim scooter. I can't identify a bike from a hole in the ground, so hope that, tomorrow when I try it some more, I will actually unlock the correct bike since it is locked up with about 20 others.

p.s. Can I gloat just a bit? I mean, look at this! I have a kitten and a scooter and stamps in my passport... I fit into my size 8 Gap jeans, even though they were kinda tight before I left Canada. I still have my tan from Malaysia. And, the cafeteria at school served a fe w edible lunches in a row (curry, then fried chicken)Wow. Just let me enjoy this for a bit..... and..... Okay. Feet are back on the ground. Sorry about that. Will try to be more humble in the future.

Jakob's Guide to Life

Hi! I'm Jakob! And... and... and... I'm using my 37-second attention span to tell you about my philosophy of life.

• Greet everything (especially dirty socks on the floor) and everyone (including Mommy) with an arched back and sideways hop.
• Mommy is busy at work all day. While she's out, redecorate the apartment with dirty laundry and shredded kleenex!
  
• Be nice to your hamster-brother. Sit on his cage and stare down at him - this will give him an extra feeling of security knowing that his big brother is looking down on him with love. And, maybe it didn't work today, but if you keep trying you will eventually be able to fit between the bars of his cage and visit him in his own home!
• Mommy needs lots of help. Your assistance is appreciated - dare I say necessary - for all sorts of tasks, including emptying the litterbox, taking a shower, getting dressed and especially cleaning Mr Shane's cage.
• Why walk when you can scurry?
• If you can reach it, it's a toy. If you can't reach it, keep jumping. You'll get there eventually.
  
• If you knock over, say, all the neatly lined up books on the table, your Mommy will be so proud of you that she may shout with joy. Once placed on the floor, jump up on the table and knock them all down again!
• Mommy loves to play. Be sure to attack her hands and feet whenever you can. She's a fast one, so always have your razor-sharp claws and teeth at the ready!
• Take an interest in Mommy's hobbies. Chew her books and jump all over her keyboard when the computer is on. Sign yourself into msn - make a phone call with Skype - open and/or delete all the icons on her desktop. Once again, you can expect her to shout with joy at your keen computer skills.
• Anything that is closed must be hiding something really interesting. If you see a once-closed door open, be sure to get inside as fast as possible. This includes the refrigerator, the toilet, the cupboard under the sink, the closet, and the sliding door leading to the 18-storey high balcony.

Finally, remember that, for now at least, you still have cuteness on your side. Nobody can resist a purring kitten... or a sleeping baby.

Dear Korea

Hi Korea. How are you? I am fine. I am really enjoying some aspects of your culture, and having a blast exploring your beautiful country but, youknow, we really need to work on this whole "food" issue.

For the past 5 months, I have been very patient. I think you will agree. Now, however, you've reached my breaking point and I don't think that we are going to see eye-to-eye on this issue for a while. I mean, it may take some negotiations, but I'm optimistic that we can reach a compromise.

Below please find a few requests and suggestions that bear some looking into:

1. "Only a little bit of ham" is not vegetarian. Vegetarian also does not mean "Animals that eat vegetables". Now, you may point out that I am not a pure vegetarian, and that I eat chicken (more on that later). But sneaking ham into EVERYTHING is just not... umm... kosher. No, well, I'm not kosher either, I'm using "kosher" to mean, like, "cool". But you knew that, right?

2. Please look into the custom found in certain cultures to remove the skin and bones from animals before eating them. Shards and splinters of chicken bones should not, I repeat, should not become lodged in the windpipe of any person who is attempting to eat lunch. God made chicken using these three rules. Chicken is a) skinless and boneless b) neatly trimmed whitemeat c) wrapped in plastic on a styrofoam tray. Any departure from these rules (including the inclusion of surprise organ meats) will incur much wrath and wringing of hands. One exception: fried chicken, which should never ever ever be eaten with chopsticks. Pick it up, put your elbows on the table and mow down.

3. Ditto for fish. Please remove all skin, fins, bones, HEADS and TAILS before including fish in your national dishes. One should not feel like they are dipping their spoon into a dirty aquarium when eating any sort of soup.

4. Stop telling me to "eat deliciously."

5. In Canada, telling someone that something is "good for your health" (meaning: Ugh, gross, like parsnips and Brussel's sprouts) is sort of like when you set your friend up with someone on a blind date and say "He's a really nice guy" (meaning: I wouldn't touch him with a 10-foot pole, but you seem kinda desperate, so why don't you go out with him?). I don't want to eat something because it's good for me! I want things that are delicious, rich, cheesy, chocolaty, with curry or alfredo and/or some sauce other than that damn red chili paste that you put on everything. Remember: Nobody ever accused pierogies (fried with butter and onions and served with sour cream) of being "good for you".

6. You've got some wicked awesome greens kicking around here. Sweet potato stems, love 'em. That stuff that looks like grass, love it. That other stuff that is some sort of stem and has those kinda leaves on them, oh yes. But, there's nothing fun about plain boiled plant stems. Let's add a bit of, I don't know, butter and pepper? Some basil? Toss with some parmesan? Once again, any seasoning other than red chili paste is great.

7. Cabbage should not be eaten if it is rotten. Cabbage should be boiled in a soup until it is buttery soft and delicious. Cabbage should never be fermented in a slurry made of fish guts and served cold with rice. Saying that this abomination is "good for your health" does not make it more appetizing (see #5).

8. Tofu. Let's talk about it. Why can't you be more like your big brother, China? A plain block of tofu on my cafeteria tray does not make me as happy as that spicy stuff I had on a street in Beijing. AND it was chopstick-pickup-able. I don't know how the Chinese do it, but they have a way with tofu. Then again, they also invented paper, didn't they?

9. Go knock on Malaysia's door and see if you can borrow some curry. I mean, just a little bit.

Thank you, Korea, for looking into this issue for me. I may think of other things that need to be added to this list, and I hope that you will remain open to hearing them.

Yours truly,

Virginia
*who just ate a bag of chips for lunch because the cafeteria at school was serving something indescribably odd.... again.

P.S. Bibimbap and kimbap (opso kogi!) are just fine the way they are.

Ahoy there MATEYS!

Greetins from the port of Yeosu, Korea, where the lovely 4-masted schooner Koreana berths when she is not plying the Sea of Japan in search of lost treasure. Shiver me timbers but twas a fine fine day to be a-sea, on a damn-ed ship if ever there was, filled to the gills with a rag-tag crew of Waguks and wenches.

Truly testing their sealegs, Captain Firepants and Cheatin' Dora Jones remained aboard whilst the robust Capt'n Cutty Cutter, Cruellest cur of the coasts and crests of the seven seas, swam a-shore in search of vittles, never so much as smudging his eyeliner.

Although no treasure was found on the day-long voyage, everyone had a grand grand time, especially those who dressed as pirates and remained in obnoxious pirate character for the whole day.

What?

This morning, when I woke up, I was... ummm... what's the word again? Ummm....

COLD!

Like, it went from super hot to cool in about 36 hours.

Doctors and Vets

Well, after hacking up what was left of my inner organs this morning, I decided to bite the bullet and visit a doctor. Now, for everyone in Canada who has ever called a doctor when sick, made an appointment for 17 years in the future, then paid $870 for antibiotics... here's how it happens in Korea: Arrive at doctor's office, see doctor within 3 minutes of arriving, answer health questions, get prescription, pay for consultation ($3) and meds ($1.50).

The meds I got were all brightly coloured and pretty. I have to take 15 pills a day (not exaggerating). That works out to.... about $0.05 a pill! Now, the fact that I have no idea what any of the pretty pink and green and peach and yellow pills do, or what they are, is certainly no cause for concern because guess what? I feel way better!

In other news, I took Jakob to the vet's for his first vaccines. And it cost.... 10 times as much for him as it did for me ($47-ouch). Oh, and the vet is a total hottie. And, in true Korean style, Jakob even got service-uh (a free can of cat food).

p.s. Just came home from Tae Kwon Do. I can roundhouse kick!

And there are nice beaches in Korea too!

After swearing up and down that I wasn't going out on Friday, I went out on Friday but still managed to make it to Wando to see Nicola. My ride to Wando on the "vomit comet" (i.e. jerky gas-and-brake Korean bus) was less than enjoyable, since adding to the general discomfort was the fact that all of the mucus in my body was trying to escape through the holes in my nose.

She'd invited a whole herd of people from Mokpo, Naju, Wando etc and it was so nice to meet new people! It was absolutely glorious on the beach, complete with a soft sand, clear water, a campfire, smores and guitars. Lacking sleep and needing to blow my nose every 30 seconds made me a bit of a Grumpy McGrumpface, and I wish I could have joined in all the revellery - such as dancing on the beach until the wee hours of the morning. As it was, I turned in early and spent most of the weekend "being a whinger" (so says Nicola, and she is quite right).

This weekend was also a mini-reunion of sorts for the original group that I'd come to Korea with. On hand from our "gang" was me, Nicola, Brent, Stephanie, Leah, (young) Warren, (handsome) Steve, Max, and Stu. Unfortunately absent were (older) Warren, (young) Steve (my big bro from Suncheon), Lana and Bryce. It was great to see how everyone was getting on - we've been here almost 5 months and everyone had great stories to tell. Everyone's experience, whether positive or negative, is different. I also got to connect with some new arrivals. Can't wait to cross paths with all those people again - and hopefully I'll be more myself and not a Sicky McSickwimp the next time we all get together.

And there's so much left to see...